Are you dating a gamer? How to avoid being played

Do you think you are dating a player? Do you want to avoid being his next conquest?

A player is a man who is actively looking for women and is in a number of “relationships” at the same time. There are hundreds of courses and books on the market that teach men how to be pick-up artists. How to master seduction techniques. How to make women sleep with them. Unfortunately, there are many men who buy these products and use these techniques to become gamers.

If you find out you’re dating a player, you have 3 options: end the relationship, stay in the relationship, or decide to play your own game. No matter which one you choose, you need to learn a few things to protect your heart.

How to know you’re dating a gamer

1. intentions: Always assume with every date that they have different intentions than you do. Even the nicest guy can exhibit gamer tendencies if you let him. So always keep your guard up. You don’t want to be any man’s temporary toy or trophy.
2. Attention: Look at the amount of attention he is giving you right from the start. Does he seem almost obsessed? Does he call you often, more often than anyone else? Trying to tie up all your free time?
3. compliments: Is he always congratulating you, making you happy, making you feel good? Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but it seems like she’s doing it more than most of the other guys you date. A player will go overboard with praise, which makes him attractive, but is a warning sign.
4. Future plans: Are you talking about the future after only a few weeks of dating? About the life he wants to share with you? The house you want. Children. Their dreams. Pushing you to exclusivity? While a man who is interested in you can do this, he won’t do it as quickly as a player. Remember that most men are very slow to talk about a committed relationship, so be careful with this.
5. Consistency: Is it inconsistent? The players are not the most honest men. So he listens to what he’s saying. This is the way most players are discovered. It’s easy to keep up the facade for a few weeks, but after a few months it’s hard to keep track of the lies.
6. Friends: When you’re around their friends, do they treat you like you don’t matter or are a joke? Don’t they make any effort to meet you? They don’t want to meet you because they know that you will soon be replaced by the new flavor of the week.
7. Looking good: How it looks matters more than your feelings? Players are obsessed with themselves and their needs. If you find that what you need is constantly put in the background, then you are probably with a gamer. Do you need to borrow money sometimes so you can spend your money on looking good? Having the right clothes, the right car, being seen in the right places with the right people.
8. Phone calls: After you’ve been dating for a while, have you suddenly gotten busy? Don’t answer your phone calls. And when he calls you back, he is always busy and can’t talk for a long time. No more hour-long conversations about your future. Just a quick call to get you to stop calling him.
9. Go out: After you’ve been dating for a while, has he stopped dating you? Do your dates tend to be at her house or yours? Does he keep you away from his friends or the places he goes? Does the man who used to buy you dinner now limit his spending to a red box dollar movie and microwave popcorn, which he tries to make you pay for?
10. sex and money: Fancy a booty call or an ATM? Does it seem after all is said and done that all you want is sex or money? In some cases, it may even appear as if you are paying him for sex.

Players want to have a lot of women so they can always get what they want. Each woman may have a different purpose. Some for money, some for sex, some to show off. A player won’t commit to anyone and he doesn’t want anyone to think they are a couple because it limits his chances of getting more women. Your best bet is to avoid getting involved with a player in the first place.

If you find out you are dating a player, you have 3 options:

1. End the relationship immediately. before it takes its emotional toll. Know that you will not change a player. If you find that you have a habit of attracting players or being attracted to players, stop dating. Take the time to see why this happens. Build your self-esteem and feel good about yourself before heading out again.
2. Stay in the relationship and eventually suffer for it. Not what I would suggest. But women do it every day. But know that there will be pain and heartbreak if you decide to go down this path. That is why if you decide to keep your player I recommend the 3rd option.
3. Accept that you are a player, set the rules and limits of your game. and casually hang out with other people too. If you keep dating him, change the game. Let your relationship work by their rules, not yours. If this means slowing him down, do it. If that means cutting it off, do it. Do what is best for you, not for him. Don’t play his game because if you do, the odds are against you. By dating other men you will know and have a constant reminder that you are not in an exclusive relationship with your player. That is what the player wants, exclusivity from YOU, never from him. Over time you will realize that you don’t really want what your player offers.

Before going on a date, whether with a player or not, you need to set your limits. Decide on some time constraints for the stages of your relationship. Know in advance how slowly or quickly you want to move towards intimacy and exclusivity. The right man will wait. A player will get impatient and eventually give up trying. That’s a simple way to remove them so you can focus your attention and affection on someone who loves you and is committed to you.