The Quiet One – The life of a codependent nurse
I guess I wasn’t quite done with the analysis of dysfunctional family dynamics. I keep processing thought after thought, story after story. I don’t have a quaint analogy to go along with this one; I can’t even find the humor. (A rarity for me) Maybe it’s because of the heaviness of the day, today is October 2, 2017, the day after the mass shooting in Las Vegas, NV. I guess nothing seems too funny today.
The vision that I still have is about the “Quieto” or the timid. Every large family usually has at least one. Sometimes he follows the stereotypical birth order and is the middle child and sometimes he is not. In my family of 5, the way it happened was that the fourth child was the quiet one. She was the homebody, the one who was much happier with my mom while she did her daily chores. The quiet one did everything in her power not to be seen, heard, touched or known. But I think she was the complete opposite, I think she was dying to be seen, heard, felt, and known. She was simply not born with the tools to do it nor was she raised to accept her gifts. She came across as such a meek person. afraid of everything She perhaps felt that she was different, that she was more in tune with the bread that surrounded her. I’m beginning to think that she’s an empath who never learned to navigate that gift.
In my article The Transformation of the Catapity, she wasn’t even mentioned. Where was she during all the chaos in our family? She was the observer, the silent witness and now I start to think that she was the sponge that was absorbing all the negative energy. The more I understand energy, frequencies and their positive and negative effects, my eyes begin to see and appreciate the impact.
What exactly is an empath? it’s a buzz word and the younger generation loves to use it. But when I was growing up there were no words. You were just unusual, shy, emotional, or introverted. Depending on how the child was dealing with the incoming information space. My understanding of an empath is someone who is very sensitive but tends to feel, absorb and internalize the feelings and pain of others. So much so that some empaths cannot distinguish the feelings, pain, or discomfort of others from their own.
The gifts of an empath are magnificent when recognized, honored, and cultivated. Here is an excerpt from an article I found helpful, “Am I an Empath?” restoreemotionalbalance.com/am-i-an-empath.html
Spiritual benefits of being an empath
Here is a simple list of the spiritual benefits of being an empath:
1. Your intuitive abilities can skyrocket practically overnight once you learn to manage your energy. You are very intuitive, clairaudient, clairvoyant, clairsentient and clairvoyant. You can learn to tap into universal consciousness for wisdom and advice.
2. You are a great manifestor! Your manifestation abilities are very strong once you learn to use the power of intention with emotional vibrational alignment.
3. You are a natural healer. Your healing abilities will improve over time, once you learn to let go and trust your flow of energy, without fear of being drained by others. Actually, when you heal others, you heal yourself.
4. You can easily connect with your inner guidance for help and support. Most empaths feel that angels are helping them.
On the other side of the spectrum is the grief of an empath who never learns to navigate the murky waters. Worst of all, most become codependent caregivers; they seek to save others because they cannot save themselves. This only makes things more complicated as they try to heal the world by inflicting more pain on themselves. His vessel bursts at the seams; deformed by the stuffing of all that junk. They fall into deep depressions and self-destructive behaviors. They just can’t cope. Here is another excerpt from the article, regarding the struggles of an empath.“Am I an empath?” restoreemotionalbalance.com/am-i-an-empath.html
Am I an empath?
1. You absorb negative energies from the environment in which you find yourself, be it from objects, electronic devices or people. You can also be sensitive to ghosts, disembodied entities, and low energies.
2. You carry a heavy load and it is not yours. You are affected by the negative behavior of others and often think about engaging in negative behavior to fit in.
3. You always seem to know what people are thinking and feeling and it affects you a lot because you care a lot and want to help. This causes you to be in codependent relationships with narcissists and selfish people, who don’t really care about you.
4. You have a hard time defending yourself and feel taken advantage of by family, friends, and even strangers.
5. In some way you feel responsible for what happens to others in your life and you end up participating in their pain. You also feel resentful for not being appreciated.
What is the cure, the solution, the way out?
The first step is always pattern recognition. Having the emotional maturity to see, know and admit that you have been affected by the pain of others. Take a few moments to reflect on the idea that a high percentage of what you feel may not even belong to you. Maybe, just maybe, you have been absorbing and storing the emotional pain or negative energy of others within your being. Could it be that your current physical ailments, emotional pain, and addictions are just a manifestation of not knowing how to recognize and allow that energy to move forward?
The second step is to seek help. Have a way of support to decipher and analyze what is real and what is not. As you shed years of pain and negative energy, you will begin to step into a new self-awareness and personal power. A twelve step program is the best way to address your addictions. Physical and emotional pain can be addressed by someone who is up to date and knowledgeable in Energy Healthcare or Energy Healing. There are several wonderful practitioners in a variety of modalities. Be smart, if you are not being directed back to your inner knowing then walk away. This is not a lifelong process; this process should not feel like yet another codependent relationship. You are your own healer. Start asking, reading and absorbing all the information you can about energy work. Don’t be fooled by gimmicks, use your empathic gifts to feel how you feel about every decision you make about your health and well-being. Remember that being an empath is not a license to bury your head in the sand. Walking in your knowledge and power will take you to a new level of joy and fulfillment.
Finally, embrace your new freedom. Enjoy the miracle of the Gift of Mercy that has been given to you. Celebrate your uniqueness, express yourself in art, in nature, in writing, or in any way that feels joyful. Play, dance and be silly. It’s never too late to remember who you really are. You were created in the magnificence and perfection of your creator.
If all this sounds too simple for a complex problem, let me remind you that we are the ones who make it complex. Our source, our creator, our higher power can help us when we choose to let go and allow.
It’s time to make “Quiet One” LOUD